Yes, My Dog Has $50 Dog Perfume #Scottsdale

Several years ago at my job in publishing, I was asked to approach a dog store in Scottsdale that was way past-due on their advertising invoices to get that nonsense closed out. It wasn’t my job and this owner was majorly avoiding us, so I was told if I could get her to give us […]


How to Tone Your Arms Like a Lazy Slob/Snob

I was digging in my closet recently and found a beach bag of 150 thongs from 2007. Literally. Making it rain day-glo lace over here. I also found my first designer handbag ever (Louis Vuitton Speedy 30), which I bought in 2006 mid-boom when logos were all that mattered. I think I wore these with […]


Can’t Even Conceal My Love for Clé de Peau Beauté

Don’t get too excited, I’ll probably neglect my blog again when nobody comments on this post. Just chilling on my balcony with my dog and flower crown like a free spirit. So, I get a several weekly “I miss your blog posts” complaints, so I thought I’d fire up the ol’ WordPress to tell you about […]


H.Bloom: A Real Man’s Valentine’s Gift

A bundle of red roses on Valentine’s Day is an afterthought-ey, vacant, vaguely sleazy gesture, if you ask me.  These are much better. I’d rather not receive a bouquet red roses. For me, they drum up images of mean men apologizing to girlfriends for that hothead tirade at Pep Boys, or something. Smart gentlemen know […]


Kate Spade Bow Valley Rosa

Valentino, where are you? Kate Spade Bow Valley Rosa Bag, $425 For a while in 2007, when I first got a job, I went crazy with my paychecks. I paid TJ only $350 monthly rent and spent the remainder of my money on gas, Starbucks and clothes (mostly from Last Chance). But also, I would […]


Frederic Malle Perfume

Words of wisdom from a perfumeaholic. Where magic is made. Frederic Malle Perfumes, prices vary If there is anyone who can sense scents, its me. I have a dog-like sense of smell and supremely creepy memory. And about three dozen bottles of perfume under my sink. I legitimately have looked into perfumer schools. And for […]


Davines Hair Product Gift Set

I just got reamed for using Head & Shoulders.     Yes, these products arrive 3/4 full which used to bother me, but now makes me laugh. It’s all “Yeah, so what? You’re lucky to get 3/4 of a container of me.” Limited Edition Holiday Gift Sets, Prices Vary So I’ve used Head and Shoulders […]


Scary 30-Second Peanut Butter Panic Cake For One

Let me warn you: it isn’t pretty. But neither am I right now. MY THROAT IS CLOSING UP, MY HAIR IS FALLING OUT AND I NEED CAKE. Sometimes you get bad news, an unexpected bill or you just plain freak.out. and cake is the only thing that kind of helps. I’ve had a bad day […]

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